Absense

"Want some gum" is the first thing he says to me. It's my friend's new boyfriend. I believe I watched him eat a sandwich and cereal "for dessert." In between chewing, slurping, and congested allergy sounds he managed to say something in monotone. For someone so intelligent she sure is easy to please. How come, this one is as bad as the last. In a different way. I watched half-horrified, as she showed me her new apartment they rent, with fake toyish furniature and "dragon blood" incense.. and thinking of their fake imaginary sexlife. She appears to me the same as a year ago, half-fake and I watch half-horrified. Fake kitchenware and fake job and fake holding hands. He is 27 with those 'baby' italian features. I ask "what is your heritage". Reminds me a little of how I had a little fake streak.

I see everything in sexualisms now. People leaving to have sex, people entering after having sex. Mostly leaving. I asked Jessi if strangers were on a first date. It didn't matter; they would later bone we inferred. If she was anything like us. People killing time before sexxing. Seeing my neighbors boning didn't help. Well, I just saw legs. But if you had a half a brain, you knew. I read an article in Psychology Today about how pornography is tearing couples apart, it said one seemingly perfect couple in Suburbia, USA had to talk with a therapist: He wanted a blow up doll, she wouldn't let him. And other unmentionables; kids may be reading. Imagine a plastic doll can satisfy your man better than you can, Lady.